She is me
Leaning in
With confidence thin,
But hope thick
That she will fit
The status quo.
Because she wants
To be pretty, you know?
She is me.
She likes
Pretty things.
Skirts that flare
And float on air
That blossom
Like a rose
With every pose.
She is me.
Red pumps
As her heart thumps
When she enters the room
Filled with gloom,
But still hopes
To make someone smile.
Sometimes,
It takes a while.
But she still tries.
She is me.
There’s pain
beneath her eyes.
On many days
In many ways
She doesn’t feel beautiful
At all.
But she is learning
To stand tall
And fight everything
Within
That insists
She will not win
Because she is learning
To love the image
In the mirror
That she sees.
Learning to believe
That she can be pretty
Because she’s witty.
And not because
Her makeup is perfect.
But because she’s worth it.
She’s learning that
Her greatest beauty is inside.
That she should not hide
If she doesn’t meet
Societal expectations.
Her elation
Instead comes from
Her heart and her head.
There are beautiful things in there
That will make you stare.
She is learning
To love herself
For who she is.
She is me.
Dr. Carla Michelle Brown * Speaker * author * Educator 
This slice, this poem, this cry from within is beautiful. You have captured that struggle each of us finds ourselves in the center of. Personal desire vs societal expectations, confidence vs lack thereof, whimsy vs practicality. I love the way the inner voice, the inner struggle, grows stronger as the poem grows longer. It says to me, hang in, there is hope!
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Suzanne, thank you so much for your kind words. This has been my incessant struggle, and on many days when I think I’ve trumped my inner trauma, it rears its ugly head. Nevertheless, those who love me most help me to fight harder against the notion that I can only feel beautiful if I “look” beautiful according to someone else’s standards. It is a hard journey, but I’m getting there little by little, one step at a time. Your encouragement is greatly appreciated! ~Carla Michelle .
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You’ve captured that inner dialogue that so many of us have as women. What a beautiful and loving poem you’ve written, Carla.
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Thank you, Stacey! I hope it counters the toxic narrative with which we contend daily – that beauty is determined by a small number of underinformed and at times, very shallow people. Our beauty is too grand, too great, too multi-faceted to force into a proverbial box. I think beauty is felt before it is seen – and I am learning to feel beautiful just because I’m me. Your words have warmed my heart. With Warmest Regards, ~Carla Michelle
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This is such a beautiful piece, Carla. The rhythms of your language have me itching to read this poem out loud! The repetition of “she is me” keeps me grounded throughout the piece. Wow–so glad to discover your blog today!
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Elisabeth, you are making my heart soar and I feel a warming smile ebbing across my face! I keep rereading this one myself, and I’m heavily leaning towards committing it to memory! I’ve received more positive feedback than I anticipated, some through private messages, that have really touched my heart. Yours is making me float even higher in the clouds, lol. Thanks so much for lifting my spirits. ~Carla Michelle
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Carla,
What a beautiful poem. I love the joyful rhymes placed carefully, and the “She is me.” She is all of us, isn’t she? Thank you for your warm and hopeful words today.
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Denise, she most certainly is! Thank you for your kind words. I’m so delighted that you enjoyed it! With Warmest Regards, ~Carla Michelle
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Gorgeous comparisons . . .
“With confidence thin,
But hope thick”
was one of my favorites. Talk yourself into your confidence! You can do it!
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Fran, it was one of my favorites, too, lol! Talk myself into it is right. I have to do it everyday! But I think I’m getting a little better every time. Cheers to no relapses! Thank you so much for reading. ~Carla Michelle
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